Questions for the Looking Glass

Do you desire to be saved from your sin or do you desire to be forgiven of your sin? Of course, the obvious answer seems to be both but don't assume the two to be one in the same. I'll attempt to explain.

On my computer, I have a button for my internet browser that allows me to "reset" the browser therefore erasing my history and all the junk that I have collected on my journeys surfing the web. Now, if I have spent any amount of time viewing explicit material, I may wish to hit that reset button in order to "clean up" my viewing history. However, what is my motivation for hitting the reset button? Do I hit the reset button in order to cover up my history in hope of avoiding any consequences that may come from my actions? Or do I hit the reset button because I no longer desire to ever look at the explicit material?

Do you desire to escape the consequences of sin or desire to escape sin itself? Do you ask to be forgiven of sin as well as asking to be rid of the intoxicating pleasure of sin?

Do you ask to be forgiven of your lack of charity and then proceed to indulge yourself or do you desire to love the neighbor, stranger, and danger as you love yourself, friends, and family? Do you desire to get on your knees as well as to do unto the least of these (Matthew 25)?

Repentance is not merely asking for forgiveness. Asking for forgiveness is the act of coming to a stop in your southbound journey in order to be refreshed (or reset). The problem here lies in the fact that although you stopped, you are still facing south. It is inevitable and only a matter of time that you will once again start to journey in the direction you are facing. It is one thing to stop for refreshment and quite a great deal more to turn around and march northward.

Don't accuse me here of searching for fruit. It is not the duty of man to be a fruit connoisseur. My questions are more on the lines of not "do you have any fruit?" but first "do you desire to be a tree?"